Ashes, Ashes We All Fall Down

Recently I heard someone mention that they think of death as the "great equalizer" and to some extent I agree. I don't want to give "death" credit for anything good as death is the opposite of life and life is from God and death is merely the absence of life. However, death has come to us in such a way that can now save us as it has come to us in perfect charity. Everyone must die. True enough. But the manner of death makes all the difference.

Oh no! Death has been mentioned. Eerie uncomfortable silence...subject change...weather is discussed. This is what I find so fascinating about a full Church on Ash Wednesday for people to stand in line and be told they are going to die while a fellow mortal rubs black ashes on their heads. In a sense, "rubbing it in." What is going on here? A phenomenon not easily understood or explained. I'll try.

God is always able to take terrible things and make them beautiful again. He is able to redeem the human race via terrible execution....through dying...He rises...through death He gives life. Sincere souls are fans of reality, truth and not avoiding things for the sake of preserving fantasy. We like being told the truth. Even people who claim to not like the "cold, hard, truth" are lying...and don't believe their own lie. What they mean is, "I don't really want to face that truth right now because I think by not considering it I can somehow stall the inevitable." People know deep down that this tactic doesn't work. A sane person can only fool themselves so long...and nobody ever fools God.

Once we've gotten over the initial shock that death is inevitable we can take several problematic roads from here. One is to believe that death should be hastened. People who commit suicide are increasing in numbers. Why? Because, I surmise, they want to take prideful control of their entire existence. They don't want to face the seemingly dark unexpected road ahead...they would rather end the road. This action is faithless, cowardly, lazy and entirely demonic. How did we do this to ourselves? Comfort, ease, convenience, self-seeking have become gods...replacing the real One...not in reality of course but in the minds of those who prefer fantasy to reality. Naturally, there are those with mental illness of various sorts that kill themselves. I'm not referring to them here...may God have mercy on them! I'm talking about those who have been consistently helped on the way toward their "ending it all" by those who teach their children to coddle their every whim and desire...who build up "self-esteem" without ever saying, "That's wrong."

One can also become too preoccupied with death and, in a sense, forget entirely to live. These people are afraid that if they give of themselves too much...if they extend too far...if they exert...take "chances"...etc they will die. Fear of death for these folks takes the form of hiding out in their caves...fearing their own shadows...staying hidden from other people...depressed, sad, distant. These people don't want to be afraid...but they are. This is due to a lack of faith. Of course "everything" can't always turn out, "all right" in the end. Tragedy is real and can strike at any time. Don't think so? Neither did the millions of people every day across the world who lose a loved one, "unexpectedly." It happens either way. Why fear it? I know I can't just slap people on the back and say, "Live it up." As this isn't where I'm going either. But if there isn't a certain degree of "living" in your life then you need to get out more and give yourself away for the sake of others. Fear disappears the more we act on love. I think this is universally true.

So what is the best view of death? The Christian one. Not mincing words here. Jesus Christ is a perfect example of being a life giver who chooses death that others might live. People like ashes because of what they want to be...not because of who they already are. What do I mean? People want to live, yes, as if they are dead to themselves (for their own selfish ambitions...or fears) but alive in Christ. We want to be identified with eternal realities instead of mere temporal realities...though both are meant to exist together in harmony. To be reminded of death and yet to know that death isn't all there is is quite possibly the best news I've ever heard. Death isn't the end for those who identify themselves with Christ...in symbol with the cross of ash upon our heads...but in reality by giving our lives to Him entirely. We don't die. Our bodies may die but our spirits live on forever. Face reality! Look at the beautiful beaten face of Christ and live.

Humility verses pride. Humility says, "I am not my own but Lord I am YOURS." Pride says, "My way. I will not serve."

Frozen Fields

To look for life in frozen fields

Is to see beyond the day

Under death the truth reveals

How through death~

Life makes her way

In the womb and frozen ground

Silence in the dark and night

Knits together every sound

Which sings of the Eternal Light

We must live in present now

Yet rely on future means

Never knowing when or how

We know it is not as it seems

As in the flame and in the light

Growing in the wintry dark

A blaze approaching through the night

Watching now for fiery spark

Our Unexpected Visitor

Last night I went with my daughter Sophia to a Vigil Mass which begins the Advent Season. She was excited to be “going it alone” with “Daddy” and I was even more glad that she wanted to go. It did not go as I expected...

One might expect, given it is the beginning of Advent (which means “Coming”) that the readings would have something to do with the approaching celebration of the Birth (Nativity) of Jesus Christ right? After all Christmas is approaching (fast) and Advent is “all about Christmas.” You know, decking halls and ringing bells and Fa, la, la, la, la in a nice little Manger far away? As often is the case in my Christian life I did not get what I expected. Here is an excerpt of the Gospel reading for the first Sunday of Advent:

“As were the days of Noah, so will be the coming of the Son of man. For as in those days before the flood they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day when Noah entered the ark, and they did not know until the flood came and swept them all away, so will be the coming of the Son of man. Then two men will be in the field; one is taken and one is left. Two women will be grinding at the mill; one is taken and one is left. Watch therefore, for you do not know on what day your Lord is coming.” (From the 24th Chapter of St. Matthew’s Gospel)

In this teaching Jesus Christ is talking about NOT His own Birth but His second coming. “Son of Man” is the way Jesus often refers to Himself. Of course we realize that if Jesus is saying these words He is not a baby anymore. In fact this teaching takes place, chronologically speaking, soon before His death on the Cross! So why in the world would the Church decide to place this reading at the very beginning of the new liturgical year? How does this fit with Christmas preparations? I considered this further.

When we celebrate Christmas we celebrate something that has already occurred. Yes? Unless you have lived on another planet (or a very remote area of this one) you realize that Jesus Christ has already been born, already died, and has already risen from the dead! So what sense does it make to celebrate something that happened over 2000 years ago? Consider your own birthday... (some of you have had MANY birthdays Ha!) what do you celebrate? Yes, of course, you celebrate the gift of life as a whole not simply the fact that you were once a baby...this would be weird. “Yeah! I was once very small! Hooray!” No. We want to celebrate the fact that we exist and others (for the most part) want to celebrate with us. (Because they also get cake) So why all this morbid talk about floods and death and the end of the world?

This is the time we live in. We live in what is referred to as “The fullness of time,” which means, very simply, that the stage is set and the great “End of the Word” drama is set to begin at ANY moment...really...really, really. So while you’re dashing around attempting to get the “newest” thinga-ma-bob at the store for so and so who will likely need yet an ever NEWER thinga-ma-bob by this time next year because the latest thinga-ma-bob is obsolete as soon as the wrapping comes off...you should remember: Jesus Christ is coming AGAIN. Are you ready? You might not be. If you’re not will you do something to get ready? Or, will you like so many others (including those who died in the flood) go about your life, “Business (or busyness) as usual?” Or, will this be the year that you begin to take your eternal life seriously? Stop playing “Eternal Roulette” and get yourself together. How much more plainly can it be said? Your eternal destiny depends on what you’re doing now. If you’re not seeking to know Jesus Christ in reality...perhaps you think you’re too busy or you’ll “get to it later.” You might be sorry forever...or joyful forever. Jesus Christ is real and is no longer, simply, “Away in a Manger.” He’s coming and we don’t know when...be ready...get ready. Let your life be an eternal “Thank you” to God. I pray I'm ready.

The Death of a Friend

The Death of a Friend

You are once again sitting and talking and laughing about something you can no longer remember. Who was sitting in which chair? You think back…it’s difficult. Wanting to go deeper into memory here, to feel it’s movement and heaviness. To hear the vibration of voice and tone of color but you turned your head too soon. The reflection only lasts for light seconds on the surface of things. Your hands and heart can’t hold them there. Quickly dancing off. You went to the refrigerator, so mundane, grabbed two beers and returned to find the darkest of rooms and the emptiest of chairs. You turn and leave.

It has been said that death is nothing to fear. It has been said that death is, “just a natural part of life.” Try convincing the dead of these, “truths.” It is much easier for a man to describe things of history with a certain careless air. Having nothing to do with the actual time or season…being neither warm or cold on our skin but held so safely behind museum cases. Delighted in from the, easy-chair-distance of life. Reflecting precious little on where our souls are headed from here, and with that, how tremendously soon we leave our bodies behind.

Many reason that since we have little say in the matter, or the manner of our own deaths that it makes little sense to give it further thought. So says the one that agrees with the, “death is a natural part of life,” mentality. Many have already stopped reading and have gone on about their lives, uncertain. Preferring to continue dash headlong into the darkness…saving for a temporal retirement and possibly wasting an eternity.

You, who are wise, return to the darkest of rooms and the emptiest of chairs. Turning on the small light in the corner of the room. Take your seat in the chair where your friend was sitting the last time. The last time, yes, realize this could be your last time. It is hard at first to get past the chill you feel in your flesh in the sickening stillness. You marvel how time seems neither long or short. It seems like yesterday, yet so long ago. Time disappears as you consider that a day has just gone by. Do you blame yourself for missing it? You should avoid being too hard on yourself. You’ve made it this far, though imperfectly, it is a worthwhile thought and you should be congratulated for reflecting more deeply than the majority of souls. A strange thought now occurs to you. You wish that you could have warned your friend to be more thoughtful, and careful. A desire so strong to raise a warning comes far too late. Yet you remain in this room pressing against your desire to leave. After all, you left so soon after it happened~ you know now is as good a time as any to remain.

There is nothing you can do for your friend now, except if you are so inclined, to pray for their soul. Advice coming from you is no longer of any value. If he could, it should be your friend, you realize, who should be warning you. But the impassable veil has been pulled between you and will only be re-opened at the hour of YOUR death. It is hard to get past the fact that even memories are difficult to recall in their entirety…just bits and pieces…fragments and flashes. O dear friend! Irreplaceable friend. I can’t get close to you.

From where you sit you rise, turn out the light and go the refrigerator. The bottles from the beer you wanted to share are gone…just orange-juice left. In fact even the picture on the wall of the two of you is fading.

Will you reflect more on your life? Will you honor your friend by making more of your life? Or will you, like the mindless hoards, fail to consider your own soul? Will you neglect your own eternity? Will you simply replace this forgotten treasure with more wasted hours and days? Today might be your last.

Another thought, since it is impossible to know the hour and time we will die it is also reasonable to assume that we are not the ones who can pick and choose the way we should live. If you have forgotten God, Whom you know in your soul is waiting for your whole-hearted return. His desire to embrace you fills and consumes the universe. You are of eternal value~ Become a true daughter or son of God. This life is but a breath. Care enough for yourself to seek the Truth you’ve been neglecting. Let your friend be a constant reminder to you~ You are called to be a child of heaven...a child of God. Anything less than His fullness is meaningless. You have my sincere prayers. Thanks for reading.

"The unexamined life is not worth living."
Socrates, in Plato, Dialogues, Apology
Greek philosopher in Athens (469 BC - 399 BC)