Dad Where is the Shampoo?

You Sweet Idolater You

Coffee...ahhh...warm drink...quiet time...my time...the right time....go ahead God...I'm ready...I'll listen for a few minutes now.... 

We are idolaters. Do you believe this? Perhaps yes and perhaps no? We have often heard that we idolize money and for some this may be very true. But even above money (we’re rarely seen sitting in a corner counting gold-coins) we’ve made an idol out of that which we believe money can or will provide for us…security, independence, efficiency, health, power, prestige, acceptance, preferential-treatment, honor, approval and yes, even love. 

There is an interesting saying that I often, these days, associate with Hippies or Flower-Children but it could have simply come out of the self-help section of any bookstore for the past 40 years or so…the notion of, “I’m okay…you’re okay.” The idea that we are to, first and foremost, accept ourselves “as is” and not feel condemned by any external mores or feelings of guilt or shame…throw them off the thinking goes. Worse yet, “You must first learn to love yourself before you can love anyone else.” Do you agree with this statement? Even a little? If so you are an idolater. Welcome to the club.

 Why are these views so problematic? Firstly, any view, if it is truly your view, is not evil intentioned in and of itself. Truly it is more, simply, a reality that is…not in itself sinful per se. We have inherited many of these ideas from well meaning (although often shallow thinking) people of our times. We are a product of our environments (or products of the rejection of our environments) and this is unavoidable to a great extent. We can’t be expected to live outside or beyond our own times anymore than a gold-fish can live beyond it’s tank…it’s water is it’s reality so to speak. Though, be it probable or not, we are called to live well above and beyond our abilities…above and beyond our natural surroundings and this is frankly where things get tricky.

 “Where your treasure is there your heart will also be.” Jesus Christ said this…do you believe it? By “believe it” I mean, do you live by it? Are you concerned about this statement as it applies to your life? What is it that you treasure? If you want God to fill your heart and to dwell in His is it even possible if your heart is absent from Him and even absent from the TRUE YOU? What do I mean? When you call upon the Lord in prayer and ask Him to fill you, guide you, guard you…what is it that you are asking Him to be concerned about…about your desires? What do you desire? What are you worried about? What plagues your thoughts? What inspires you? What motivates you? If what you desire or are concerned with is anything or anyone OTHER THAN our Lord Himself then you can’t honestly expect Him to respond…right?  The real "you" is not what you've made but what our God desires to make of you.  Is this true?  Should God be sought on our own terms?

 The question that necessarily must be asked is, Is the Lord your treasure? If you say, “Yes” then you’ve decided to live a life that looks like your concerned about nothing other than Him and the increase of His Kingdom both in yourself and in everyone else you come in contact with on a daily basis. What would other people say that you treasure? I treasure quiet reflective time and chocolate ice-cream with almonds. If I am interrupted in “my” quiet reflective time by a request to “watch me dad” I can become irritated. If I find out that someone other than me finished off the LAST of the chocolate ice-cream with almonds I will quickly be giving a homiletic-discourse on the importance of throwing off selfishness and the importance of mortification for the Christian soul. And you’re just like me. Sorry.

 So what of it? What am I supposed to do with the fact that I generally do prize other things above God and above my sacrificial love for other people? Let our prayer be this:

 “Lord Jesus have mercy on me, sinner that I surely am. Lead me to die that I might surely live. You have given yourself to me that I might give myself to You. Help me Lord.”

 Will this do the trick? I assure you it won’t…not right away. But it is certainly a first-step in the long pilgrimage back to our intended place as sons and daughters of God.  You know this is where you want to be and if you don't I'm praying for you.  I can't change your mind or heart.  Believe it or not:  We are not meant to be sons and daughters of our age. We are meant to swim against the rising tide of self-centeredness…we are to prize the Eucharist and God’s Holy Church above and beyond our own desires. We are to place others first. We are to be heroes of this age and not victims of this age. The cultural norm, in one statement if I could be the one to define it would be: “I decide...I am mine...I decide my own truth.” No you don't.  We are to say, “Lord I am fully and completely Yours…thank You.” Let your life be a “Thank You” and not, “More, more, more!”

Be real...be authentic...be who you truly are...a son or daughter of God.  Not that false deity you've made yourself out to be.  Live for what matters while you still can.  The first step is the most difficult and that would be to take a few days and consider that which stands as an obstacle between you and God.  Finances?  Hobbies?  Sports?  Television?  Fear?  You name it and ask God to help you.  He will.

I recently read a post on facebook by a close family member that disturbed me greatly. This is not the first time I've been disturbed by a post on facebook (and by "disturbed" I do not mean "offended"...there is a difference and the difference is key) that indicated a very strong, "anti-theist" or "atheist" viewpoint. That being, essentially (not verbatim): "It is ironic that in the same country founded for religious freedom...becomes a nation where the "religious" persecute the freedoms of others." Of course, this could be referring to many things but principally it would appear to be regarding (so called) "Homosexual Marriage" (and I say "so called" because it is NOT marriage and never can be a true Sacramental Marriage)...or it could be referring to abortion...could be "all of the above"...who knows.... At any rate what is clear to me is that this is a prevailing attitude among the self-proclaimed: "I'm spiritual...just not religious" crowd. The serious error in this view that I wish to address (though there are many that should be addressed) is this: the false notion of freedom. Their thinking goes something like this..."It's a free country and everyone here should be able to do whatever they want as long as it doesn't interfere in the lives of others." Or similarly, "Who are YOU to say what I should or should not do with my body?" On the surface these might seem reasonable as they are very broad in their scope and vague. But what lies underneath (and here "lie" is intended) is a false notion that religious people want to subjugate others and simply make others "follow the rules." I would suggest nothing could be further from the truth...here's why... A truly "religious" or truly "Spiritual" person (capital S on Spiritual this time...also intended) is one who desires the "ultimate best" for the sake of others. What does this look like? Essentially, we come (as Jesus Christ) to serve and NOT to be served. We do not want to create some "perfect society" simply where others are prone (by force or coercion) to simply "do what we say!" This is absurd to the truly Spiritual person. What we DO want is for Souls to not be damaged and/or destroyed. Much like the example of the loving Mother who does not want her children to eat mounds of candy because Mothers love their children too much to give them, immediately, whatever they happen to want. Or the loving Father who would weep over the poor choices of a drug-addicted son...it is not so much the "rules" that are our main concern...but the harm that we know is caused by giving in to homosexual temptations...by abortion...by contraception...by euthanasia. I would sum it up in this way: it is true we are "free." Free to love and free to throw ourselves off the cliff. Our freedom to love is compromised to the degree we selfishly choose for sin and to feed our own sinful inclinations...just as our freedom to live is compromised by our desire to pretend we can fly off said cliff. It isn't that we "hate" or want to "persecute" those with opposing views but we have simply tasted eternal life...seen glimmers of the purity and holiness of God...we have experienced divine transformation (to one degree or another) in our hearts. The truly Spiritual (born of the Holy Spirit) do not hate anyone...but surely love...and this love leads us to challenge that which we know will kill...either physically, or much worse yet, spiritually kill. What then is freedom? Freedom is to be fettered to the love of God in Christ Jesus. Limited in denial of sin, yes, but here the entire universe is ours to inherit. So many are throwing their lives away for meaningless "tendencies" and sinful "inclinations." Yet, our Lord has taught us that we are to be called, "Children of the Father." What we gain by sin is death and what we gain by denying our sinful inclinations (for the sake of Our Lord) is eternal life. How is such a "fettering" freedom? Because we are free when we live corresponding most closely to our nature and our divine-purpose. We cheapen these things through lack of Chastity and Purity. License is doing what you want...jumping from the plane without a parachute...you can do this...but this only lasts so long. Whereas eternity in joy is for those who persevere and turn, repent and place themselves in the loving arms of God.

Why People Who Aren't Christian Are (Rightly) Tired of Christians

There are as many reasons as there are people who aren't Christian I'm sure. But I'm going to make some guesses based on my own experiences of myself (Yes I'm intending to communicate my own reality and hope it helps you.) I can't be exhaustive in other words because it would be too exhausting.

It is often said that non-Christians are tired of hypocrisy. I can easily understand this because I'm tired of hypocrisy in all other people beside myself...no, I'm tired of myself too. The problem is that Christians truly aren't supposed to be hypocritical. In reality, non-Christian people have every reason and can legitimately BE hypocritical and it makes sense. The non-Christian people, I believe, know this intuitively and find it abhorrent that someone would claim to be "in Christ" and a "New Creation" but really don't act any differently than anyone else. Where I see this in myself I'm damn tired of it too. The problem is that our lives aren't really changed though we often claim they are. I think what is often meant is that we've decided that we're "betting on Jesus" than giving our lives LIKE Jesus and this is a serious problem which makes Christians seem ridiculous.

Another thing is that many Christians think more like "Precious Moments" greeting cards than they do in any dimension of the Cross...in any form of self-giving and sacrificial love. Overly sentimental views of Christ don't fit the Son of God. Like Jesus Christ as "cuddle bunny" or "best friends forever." Ick. Get rid of this view, please, though it might be nice for you to have "God loves me" napkin rings this will not save anybody from anything.

I should have called this article, "Another Thing" because I have another thing...Telling people about Jesus is good. Right? The problem is the sugar-candy version doesn't meet people where they actually live. People need to know that Jesus Christ is more than a story but that He has actually affected your life and how. Like the old saying goes, "You can't be a Christian without Christ." I agree with this but what does it mean, truly, to you to "have Christ?" Does this mean that now you've decided not to cheat on your taxes? Or speak harshly to a loved one. People want, and should be able to expect, results. Do you live like everyone else or has God actually changed your life because you call on his Spirit to help you? Christians must realize that we are poor...poverty stricken with a true inability to love. I have difficulty loving other people and I often forget to ask for the Lord's help to love others. I forget who God is and who I am...it's easy to do.

All in all the bottom line is our inability to love and how we Christians truly need to call on God to help us...quickly...constantly. If not we're just ridiculous...you know it.

What Were You Thinking?

"Brown Coffee Blues"
(Cue crunchy blues guitar)
I woke up this mornin'
Stumbled out of my bed
Something, something, something
That rhymes with "bed."

I tasted my coffee
Blah blah blah blah
Wanting more coffee
Ya Ya Ya Ya!
(Last line intended to be sung with Swedish accent...Stockholm Blend)


I didn't have enough coffee this morning and therefore my lack of caffeine is even impacting my ability to have the Blues. It would be more true to say I have the "Browns" because coffee is brown (pitch-black in my case.) But, as brown is not symbolically associated in any way with music but more closely with a bad football team from Cleveland...I'll begin here by leaving well enough alone. I digress...whatever that means.

What I actual want to say:

I've come to realize that following the Lord means just that, following Him. It does not mean dressing up our desires in sheep's clothing. I have been able to justify many wrong-headed things in my life on the grounds (not coffee grounds) of the action or intention of following, "God's will." "Justification" is not a spiritual-gift...I believe this is a trap that many Christianesque-minded folks (as well meaning as we might be) when it comes to our pursuit of worldly things, desires and pursuits. Consider the following statements/interior thoughts which are not meant to be absolute statements against what they might represent, but are intended, merely, to allow us to do some self-analysis...

1) "I will do this because, after all, doesn't God want me to be happy?"

My how sly. What is the problem? Personal intention becomes the goal and God becomes a bottled-Genie. Instead of beginning with, "God, I want what you want when you want me to have it." It begins with, "I want it." Of course this is the essential plague of sin on humanity...nobody can escape this entirely. But it should give us pause next time we hear ourselves beginning with our own desires and not beginning with an ear and heart established in God.

2) "God can do anything He wants...so if it happens it must be His will."

This is equally, if not more, spiritually dangerous than #1. This view resigns God as the "paddle" and us as the "ping-pong-ball." This view has at it's very root a mis-belief that God is merely a "force" and not personal. This view of God is more akin to Zeus than to the God of the Old and New Testaments. Surely, God allows certain things and will withhold certain things...God does surely act in time and space and in our lives. However, He is personally concerned, primarily, with the state our souls and is not distant and aloof. It would be more accurate to say, "God loves me and all things that happen, He does allow, but that I might be drawn ever and increasingly closer to Him." Therefore, to keep God at a distance (as in statements #2) is to cheapen our view of God. He is involved, though often silent, but whether in silence or in speaking everything is intended to lead us, shape us and prepare us for heaven.

3) "I want to live a little first...I'll get back to God later."

There is no life apart from God. Every breath we draw is a sign of His love and faithfulness. God does not have a "pause button." Either you are moving toward Him or you are moving away from Him. Either you are currently aiming to give all to Him or you are in disobedience. With God there is no "middle-ground" and there is no "neutral." Jesus Christ said, "He who is not with Me is against Me." God is surely merciful but with limits. A day will come (be it at your own death or when Jesus Christ returns...whichever comes first) that every knee will bow and every tongue confess that He IS LORD. If we were to do a poll in hell we would find that the majority of people there were surprised to find their souls in such a place. Some would dare to say that there is no hell. Those who maintain this view are guilty of spiritual-wishful-thinking. God is not your play-thing. As Jesus Christ said,

“This is the time of fulfillment. The kingdom of God is at hand. Repent, and believe in the gospel.”

Key words: fulfillment, kingdom of God, at hand, repent, believe, gospel. Now is the time. Now or perhaps never.

Finally, back to coffee and the blues. Justification of a coffee-addiction is one thing but justifying a life apart from God is quite another. Why would we do this? Simply because we have not had an encounter with God...or if we have encountered God we have chosen a path that is leading in the opposite direction. Return to Him and know true, abiding joy and peace...the best part of waking up.

Ideas for Lent 2012

We are winding down on the final hours before our foreheads are marked with ash and our Lenten Season begins. This year, more than any other, I've considered more deeply how to celebrate this season and I offer here a few suggestions for you.


1) Prayer. Of course prayer comes first...but why?

Taking a decisive stance on prayer will change your life (and those around you) forever. You'll need to set aside the time (make it daily.) How often have you come to the realization that you need to pray more...listen to the Lord more...and you haven't actually done it. Do it now. Begin Wednesday. Make it in the morning if you can...even better make it morning and evening. Also, don't begin with a marathon of prayer because you will burn out. Just begin with a small time but be militantly faithful about it. Maybe you have an odd schedule like me? Make it less an issue of "what time" but make it an issue of faithfulness. If you aren't for some reason able to pray in the morning~ don't lose hope. Just make sure this time happens and happens every day. Start by just sitting down and saying to the Lord, "Lord, I offer myself to you...help me to pray." He will. You will be changed.

2) Pray with Holy Scripture. The written Word of God...why bother?

Many people wonder what they should do with their lives...with their time, talents etc. Without realizing it, in the Gospels, Jesus Christ (the Eternal Word) has revealed much about the way to live. Of course, the Gospels aren't trendy Self-Help books, on the contrary, they are more directed toward how we might give up our lives in order to find our true lives in Him! "Pray Scripture" means, to read it and "pray through it" in such a way that your heart is attentive. Don't just breeze through but actually take the time to let the Word "wash over you." Drink it in and ask Our Lord how to apply it to your day...for THAT day. Find a Bible...read the Gospel of John. It will change your life.

3) Turn down the dials. Listen to the right things.

Pope Benedict XVI famously said, ‎"We are no longer able to hear God – There are too many frequencies filling our ears." Do you want to hear from God? Turn down the other things that distract you. For me, Facebook is often edifying but just as often a distraction. Also, reading faithful Catholic books and watching edifying movies about the lives of Saints. The new series by Fr. Robert Barron is a great resource, entitled, "Catholicism" produced by Word on Fire. We're not quite finished with it but I'm considering finishing it up and watching it again during Lent...and turning down the dials on the other "neutral" or even spiritually negative stuff out there. Better yet, give some time for silence. Make it a prayer and then be quiet..."Lord, speak, your servant is listening." How can a loving Father resist such a heart?

4) Begin and begin again. Don't lose heart.

Often for me the realization that I've already "blown it" either by sin or simply by blowing off my resolutions causes me to avoid getting back on the proverbial "horse" again. I have to remember that my failure is merely a sign on my own weakness and therefore my own need for the Lord's help. Our Lord allows difficulties, temptations and "dark days" that we might better recognize the Light. We are sinners all and if we begin expecting in some ways to fall...yet with the firm resolve for when we do fall we will simply get back up again...this is the mindset of a true Victor! Confession! Confession! I always leave the confessional feeling so light and my soul feeling refreshed. I plan on taking part in this Sacrament often during Lent. It is the son who returns to the Father that can receive the blessing of the Father. Don't keep trying to fix everything on your own. You can't. Don't miss out on the true, deep, spiritual healing waiting for you in the Sacrament of Reconciliation. The Lord gives grace to the humble. Go. Be humble.

5) Mass and Adoration. Be filled with Him...Rest at His feet.

Understand that the Lord loves you and longs to be with you. Do you ever experience how you feel so much better and think so much more clearly after receiving our Lord in Holy Communion? Why? Because the Lord is truly present. It is the same with Adoration (particularly for those who aren't able at this time to receive the precious Body and Blood of Jesus)...make it a point to give Eucharistic Adoration a try. Simply go, sit, and don't worry. Maybe you could say to the Lord, "I'm here." Then if your mind wanders don't worry. Consider yourself sitting in the presence of a cherished loved one. Words aren't always needed. Just enjoy His presence.

If you're still reading this you're in my prayers because it is likely the Lord desires to reveal Himself to you in a very significant way. It's no accident that you're reading this page. You are one who is willing to approach the Lord and your desire is not mere curiosity. Even if you're completely unfamiliar with the above ideas and practices don't worry about it. I'm glad to answer any questions you might have and I would gladly assist you personally in finding places to attend adoration or even ways to begin a journey into learning more about the Catholic faith...the faith of the Apostles of Jesus Christ...the very Church established by Jesus Christ Himself.

Write to me: robdaddyf@gmail.com

May the Lord grant you His eternal peace!

Let yourself entertain entirely new possibilities in life. Jesus Christ has come that you might have life and have it in abundance. Nobody is far from God.

A Call for Unity ...Unity?

Dear Americans there is a problem. I've never heard the word "unity" used so many times in my life as I've heard over the last couple of days due to the 10 year anniversary of 9/11. Let me suggest something: we don't know the meaning of unity and, therefore, can't achieve it.

A house divided against itself will fall. We are divided against ourselves. Sure, most people have a strong emotional response when they recall the heroic actions of many who died on 9/11. Especially when we hear songs, tributes and even prayers offered up for the victims of the attacks. I am in no way against these things and I, of course, am an American Patriot. I therefore want what is best for America...here it is...

There is no unity among two people if they don't recognize God as their Father...let alone millions of people. We each have our own vague notions of unity but these notions have no teeth...no foot in reality...mostly just talk about a "nice idea."

Want real unity in America and in the rest of the world. Love as God loves...serve as God serves. Give your own life for the sake of others and stop chattering about it until you do.

Many good tributes have been written about the victims and their families but my stand alone favorite was from our own Pope Benedict XVI Click Here for his thoughts on 9/11. His appeal here says it far better than I can. Want peace? Reject violence. In order to reject violence even between brothers we need to be equipped to truly love the person next door. If we can't~ we won't. I suggest we all pray that we would be converted to love our enemies and pray for those that hate us...and seek to persecute us.

Let there be peace~ beginning with me.